2. Marmalade

Pairs well with toast

She was sticky, small, and smelled of orange. When she got angry, which was often, she’d grow long, brown branches all around her.

Her main grievance as of late were her patients, at the vet for people. They came in often and complained.

Sometimes they were too long, too fat, too hairy, too strong. They wanted to be fixed and asked it be quick. What was wrong with these people? There was nothing wrong with them at all.

Each day, she closed her office promptly at five—filled with rage and reaching for her clippers. “I want no more of these people. I want to hear real problems and ones I can solve.” Her frustration was so often that now her thorns had tripled.

The next day, her least favourite patient Lan came in. He was big and looked brave.

“I assure you. There’s really nothing wrong here. You’ve grown just fine and you’re not too tall.” Turned out he was not that brave at all. He thought too much about nothing and tried to see himself small.

“But I see so many like you, each day big, even bigger. You can reach everything you want. What’s there to find wrong?” Still, he felt tall.

This made her branches grow longer and browner. Now she was the one who felt wrong. “What are you looking at?” Lan couldn’t stop staring. “Don’t look at me! My thorns are just all long.” Not understanding, he pointed to her left.

The twigs, now dark brown and strong, were carrying something round and orange now. He hadn’t known that his doctor was a fruit tree all along!

Thinking herself a bush this whole time, she grew furious and was covered in fruit.

She rushed as usual for clippers, trying to cut them all away. He thought her crazy and asked to use them. “These oranges? For what?” She had had enough of this not short man. “For marmalade! I was going to buy them anyway.”